Should i email her

Once, your options for doing so might have been sparse: pick up the phone or write a letter. But these days, you have to decide: Should you call or text, use Snapchat, or reach out on Twitter, Messenger or Skype? As an ethicist specializing in social technologies , such questions interest me. These choices play a significant role in our lives. As anthropologist Stefana Broadbent observes :. From asking a partner to pick up dinner on the way home to checking in on a neighbor with health problems, many of us frequently face the question: How should I communicate?

I use a theoretical framework known as virtue ethics to tackle such issues. Thinking about how communication channels both affect and express our character can help us make appropriate decisions in each circumstance.

The core idea behind virtue ethics is that most of us want to cultivate traits or virtues that will help us live well. These virtues can be cultivated through repeated practice, but they can also be destroyed in the same way. Aristotelian virtue ethics emphasize that people should try to aim at the right amount of a trait : Too much fear can make it hard to function, but too little will get them injured.

What counts as the right amount can vary based on context - warfare and child care may call for very different sorts of reactions. Nevertheless, some general guidelines can help us think about what kind of people we want to be, and how to get there.

We want to be generous, not selfish or servile. We want to be brave, not cowardly or rash. We want to be thoughtful, neither too impulsive nor overanalytical.

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Utilizing both counseling and teaching, my relationship coaching is solution focused. With my help, you'll learn about the dynamics underlying all relationships and be better able to assess the situation you are currently in and discover what you can do to move away from your current unsatisfying situation, towards your ideal life.

Contact Info. Calgary, Alberta Phone: 1. As for color, black is the safest choice. Just as jokes get lost in translation, tone is easy to misconstrue without the context you'd get from vocal cues and facial expressions. Accordingly, it's easy to come off as more abrupt that you might have intended: You meant "straightforward," they read "angry and curt. To avoid misunderstandings, Pachter recommends you read your message out loud before hitting send. For best results, avoid using unequivocally negative words "failure," "wrong," "neglected" , and always say "please" and "thank you.

After all, email is dangerously easy to forward, and it's better to be safe than sorry. This story first appeared on Business Insider. Top Stories. Top Videos. Getty Images. Vivian Giang and Rachel Sugar contributed to earlier versions of this article. Include a clear, direct subject line. Use a professional email address. Think twice before hitting "Reply all. Include a signature block. Use the same font, type size, and color as the rest of the email, she says. Use professional salutations. Don't use laid-back, colloquial expressions like, "Hey you guys," "Yo," or "Hi folks.

Use exclamation points sparingly. If you choose to use an exclamation point, use only one to convey excitement, Pachter says. Be cautious with humor. Know that people from different cultures speak and write differently.

Reply to your emails--even if the email wasn't intended for you. Proofread every message.